Bruv II: Electric Bruvaloo [D3, LM]

[Frankie Reynes]

"So, this has been an experience so far, yeah? There's a lot I don't get about this universe, but in some ways it's nicer than the one I'm from. In other ways, worse? Oh yeah, spoiler alert, I'm not from this universe. I know, some of you think I'm delusional yeah? But it is what it is, init? Anyway, things I like... free food. That's a thing for all of you, yeah? Not just me? Good. What else? Less daily disasters and fewer supervillains going around destroying cities on a weekly basis. No alien invasions, yet. Those might still be coming, I don't know. Oh, and most people are pretty nice, except that one vampire I met who tried to kill me."

She looked pensive for a moment.

"It's surprising how many vampires have tried to kill me in my life so far. I mean, any vampires trying to kill you is surprising, but it being more than one? That's like, doubly surprising. Unless it's more than two times, then it's triply surprising or even more than that."

"Anyway. Things I don't like... all the focus on money and commercial endeavors, yeah? That just seems a little, meh, init? But I guess no universe's perfect."

"Let's see, what else to talk about. I'm starting to make friends, I guess? I haven't had a lot of friends, they tend not to stick around very long. So I guess time will tell. Bee Girl needs to learn to live a little before throwing her life away in marriage. Maybe not with Lil'D, though. I mean, girl... Mustache guy would look better without the mustache, but then what would we call him? Photography girl... she scares me. I mean, she might *actually* be able to see me even when I go full ninja stealth mode yeah? *Nobody* does that."

She looked pensive again for a moment.

"Well, except that vampire did, but okay."

"Oh, and who could forget Michael Bay? Not other Frankie, for sure. I don't really know what she sees in him. Other than that he's hot. But I mean, how would that even *work*, yeah?"

"Anyway, I guess that's about all I have to talk about. Oh, I guess this universe has about five months left or so before it explodes into nothingness unless I fix it. But don't worry, I'm on the case. Anyway, bye!"